You think you know but you have no idea...

As some of you may know I live in the Williamsburg/Bushwick area of Brooklyn. Allot of people classify the whole are as the Hipster bubble but I don't really think that's accurate. I mean sure, there are allot of hip handsome people still here but i thought I'd give some insight on some of my favorite groups of people who live around me.

That Guy: This guy is probably the most popular amongst the Williamsburg population. Seemingly harmless from a distance but upon closer examination you can tell exactly what's on this guys mind. In his late 20's to 30's he carouses the Bedford strip in search of organic flax muffins and a soy chai latte before yoga class. Sporting the latest clothing and accessories he some how manages to throw the whole thing off by trying to slip in a little piece of his former self such as a pair of clogs, hemp anklet or some rock climbing fleece. Driving a bike with an "impeach Bush" sticker on the back he's dead set on making some changes. He's found his oasis here in Brooklyn to relive his glory days at the local bar but don't even think of smoking near this guy outside unless its a clove or American spirits or you may get an eye roll or at worst a shake of the head in disgust. He's a huge spin doctor's fan.

I Hope he eventually drowns in chocolate silk.

The LUG(lesbian until graduation): It was only a matter of time before people had to not only change their entire image and personality to fit in, but now their sexual orientation. Parading around in their vintage tattered clothes they are here, they are temporarily queer, and they are young good looking artist girls who've chosen a shorter hair style. Power marching to the record store or the more expensive organic bodega, they are holding hands with authority. A mear look in their direction with a friendly smile will be followed with a "WHAT! Never seen a Lesbian before you PIG!!!". As shocking as a new Eddy Murphy movie, these girls are more upset that nobody cares anymore except their parents. Oh, and they work at every bagel store in Brooklyn.

There's no way their just doing this for attention...right?

Too cool for school...or anything: This guy has got it all figured out. The king of Brooklyn in his mind but would never admit to it because even thinking that he's cool makes him uncool but he knows he's cool because he's doing everything to be as cool as he can in a whatever way. Residing in the heart of the hipster scene he knows everybody else is just a poser. Reading "on the road" on the train strictly to be double ironic, wearing the latest clothes as a symbol of irony, riding a fixed gear bike and laughing at others riding them because he's doing as some joke inside his head. He's obviously on another level of cool and is hoping that he can find a girl smart enough to see his intentions by looking at him, but do you think the girl is gonna look at him and think everything he's doing is strictly to be ironic and anti hip or she's just seeing a skinny kid in glasses reading a popular book on a single speed bike? Don't tell him though...

This is the kind of guy that wouldn't laugh at a

fart joke unless it was on vinyl.

Hate, Hate, Hate, Hate...

I'm a hater!

Cpt. FH